IS BIBLICAL MARRIAGE THE KEY TO UNLOCKING HUMAN POTENTIAL?

Written by Abrie JF Kilian. Unlocking Human Potential

Marriage is far more than a convenient arrangement or a fleeting connection between two people. It is a character forge and a lifetime commitment to meld, refine, shape and hone. A pilgrimage where divine purposes are realised through shared commitment, trial and tribulation. In this sacred bond, a righteous man helps his wife discover her fullest potential, while she, in turn, reveals parts of him that he may never have known.

Dr. Gina Murray’s Biblical Family Structure: The Them in Him explores this profound dynamic, showing that a woman is not just a companion but an essential partner who brings out the best in a man. And as history has shown us, sometimes unlocking the full potential of life’s purpose requires more than one key.

The Woman: Hidden Until Revealed

Dr. Murray posits with theological clarity that the woman is, from the dawn of creation, woven into the very fabric of the man. The Bible, in its majestic and unassailable authority, tells us in Genesis 2:22 that Eve was drawn forth from Adam’s side. This was no accident of divine whimsy but a masterstroke of providence. She was not created apart from him, nor merely alongside him, but was rather a mystery embedded within, awaiting revelation.

Until the moment of her unveiling, the man is a solitary warrior, wandering the vast expanse of creation, not understanding the full breadth of his calling. However, when a man finds his cause in YHWH, with an orchestration known only to the heavens, she is revealed—his helpmeet and his support. The modern world, with all its tinkering and intellectual arrogance, would have us believe that the woman exists in splendid isolation, that she is an entity unto herself, unbeholden to the design of creation. But the Bible, eternal in its wisdom, reminds us otherwise. YHWH unlocks the grand design of the man, and the woman is the living key to unlock some aspects of his righteousness.

The Man: Keeper of the Keys

Like a sculpture, it is not enough that the woman is revealed. Without a man of wisdom, strength, and righteousness, she may remain unawakened to the vastness of her abilities. Forever trapped in marble, impatiently waiting for a righteous man who, through steadfast leadership and unwavering faith, chisels away so she may flourish. Proverbs 31, that storied testament to womanly excellence, speaks of the virtuous woman whose worth is above rubies. But note, dear reader, that her husband is “known at the gates” (Prov. 31:23). The kingly man and the queenly woman stand in tandem, each uplifting the other to heights unknown.

William Luck, in The Morality of Biblical Polygyny, wryly observes that without the influence of a wise woman, a man risks becoming a “cold and detached ruler,” his decrees lacking in warmth and wisdom. A virtuous woman will temper his reason with grace and soften his justice with mercy. Together, both man and woman form an indomitable force, greater than the sum of its parts, ruling not in division but in harmony. History abounds with such pairings, where the strength of the man was only fully revealed through the presence of a woman—or perhaps, through the presence of more than one.

The Woman as the Catalyst for Revelation

In every great man’s life, there is a moment of awakening. Often, it comes not through solitary meditation nor through arduous toil, but through the quiet wisdom of a woman’s counsel. The Bible is a treasury of such instances: Abigail, whose swift wit turned David from folly; Esther, whose courage swayed an empire; Ruth, whose devotion rewrote her destiny and that of Boaz. Each of these women stood not merely as passive ornaments but as catalysts, igniting in their husbands and benefactors an awareness of their own greater purpose. Each of these women either married or betrothed.

Dr. Murray asserts, with undeniable precision, that a woman’s influence is often imperceptible in its inception but undeniable in its fruition. It is through the trials and triumphs of marriage, through discourse and shared adversity, that a man begins to grasp the full scope of his calling. Emerson Eggerichs, in Love & Respect, captures this notion aptly, arguing that when a man feels truly respected and supported, he rises to the fullness of his calling. Respect, that oft-forgotten virtue, is the ember that stokes the fire of his destiny.

The Divine Blueprint: An Ever-Unfolding Masterpiece

This, then, is the divine mystery of marriage. It is not a mere partnership, nor a mutual exchange of benefits, but an ever-unfolding revelation of purpose. John Witte Jr., in The Western Case for Monogamy Over Polygamy, remarks that the “one-flesh” union of Genesis is not a mere poetic sentiment, but the very architecture of divine order.⁸ And who among us can claim to know the full measure of a man’s destiny without first considering the vital role of those who stand beside him, shaping him, challenging him, unlocking him?

Conclusion

Marriage, at its pinnacle, is a dance of revelation. Through her wisdom and grace, the woman unlocks the hidden chambers of the man’s soul. The man, through his steadfast leadership, unveils the latent brilliance within the woman. Together, they build a legacy, a house not made with hands but with the very essence of divine intent.

Let us then cast aside the withering ideals of modern individualism and return to the eternal wisdom of the Bible. For it is in the sacred interplay of man and woman that the grandest symphonies of human destiny are composed. And though the world may forget, the pages of history bear witness: some men were meant to carry more than one key, and some destinies required more than one hand to support them.

References

1. Gina Murray, Biblical Family Structure: The Them in Him (Greenville: Madrina Media, 2016).

2. William F. Luck Sr., The Morality of Biblical Polygyny (Paperback, January 1, 2014).

3. Emerson Eggerichs, Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2004).

4. John Witte Jr., The Western Case for Monogamy Over Polygamy (Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2015).